A Silly Saying People Use

The saying,” don’t be a pussy,” is not something I ever really looked too much into. I was watching a comedian talk about how people use it and how bizarre it is, because when you think about it, the pussy, (unless you’re talking about a cat) is very powerful. We push babies out of there and then, it still performs and does what it needs to do again. It’s quite a compliment to be called a pussy, in my opinion. Not to mention, the war that goes on for about a week or less if you’re lucky, when it’s, that time of the month for us. You can make it tighter or as loose as you want it. The body is remarkable and if any body part should be used in a mocking way, I would nominate the penis just for going limp, especially after the deed is done. How about, ”don’t be a dick.” #powertothepussy

To Love Isn’t to Neglect

Neglectful : Not giving proper care to someone or something. I would never neglect someone or something because I know the feeling all too well. You could be the one giving all the attention and in return, you get pushed away or basically told, you’re not worthy of attention. It doesn’t matter that you push harder and work harder at understanding why someone is the way they are because you can not change them. Even though it seems like it’s simple and if only they could understand how they’re acting and correct it, that would make life, pretty easy. If other people only hear one person being upset and they bud in, trying to act like that person is horrible and how could they be mad, it only makes matters worse because they have no clue how bad the other person maybe hurt them…Countless times and yet, that one person will play the victim and not own up. If you love someone, you don’t let other people trash them, you stick up for them and own up for your mistakes.  If you can’t hear someone out and make time for an actual conversation, look in the mirror and find where your faults are before hurting someone with your silence. Then, the other person feels stupid for staying because it’s a broken record. The giving in, is the worst part because you know it will happen again and the neglect will creep up sooner than later and the disappointment will sink in, once again. You’ve let your walls down for what? Actions speak louder than words, in my opinion and I’ve yet to see that change from people. Being neglected is one of the worst feelings and no one deserves to feel it…Unless you’re a really bad person, then you shouldn’t be around people. A fault of mine is, I can care too much and give my all, to people who don’t deserve it. I had one person ask me, ” why do you stay around people who act that way?” And I said ,”because it’s hard for me to give up on people.” She said, ”that’s a good answer.” It seems like it’s easy for people to treat the one who does everything for them and people in general, the worst. I’ll never understand that. Expressing yourself in a million different ways, won’t help either. It only makes it worse, unless you are reasoning with a reasonable person, which is rare. All I can say is, I do and did what I can, I tried over and over again, I pushed hard and made myself fall apart for nothing and no one worth falling apart for. Anyone or anything that makes you cry or makes you feel less than, know you’re more than that and worth it. Maybe not to that person, but you’ll be that person to someone else who will appreciate all you have to give.

This is for anyone in any type of relationship such as, friend, family, boyfriend, girlfriend.. Love and care from good and genuine people, are out there.

My miscarriage & how I was able to move forward

I always wanted to be a mom and I couldn’t wait to tell people when it finally happened. My body hates me, so I have some medical issues that I thought would get in the way of me getting pregnant, but it happened. I started feeling bloated and my basal body temperature was up for almost a week so I knew something was up. We found out at 7 weeks and all I could do, was cry. I was scared, happy, and shocked. We told people immediately, which is not how I wanted to do it, but such good news like that couldn’t wait. We had some support, but some people, like my sister, told me she didn’t want to talk to me and wouldn’t support me and basically told me to get an abortion because she didn’t approve of my relationship.Other family members and some friends were there for us, but ultimately, we only needed each other. Major migraines started happening and I pushed through it as well as some bleeding. I went to my OB and he said that I should be fine and everything looks good. I started bleeding more, but had symptoms and my belly was staying bloated so I figured things were okay. I had an ultrasound done because I was worried and they didn’t see anything, however, my OB said that was normal and the baby could be hard to see right now. 9 weeks rolled around and I still was bleeding along with some cramps. They told me to go to the hospital, but I waited two more days because my boyfriend said we should wait and I went along with that. I suddenly felt that I wasn’t pregnant anymore.. Hard to explain the feeling.. I looked a little pregnant, but the feeling inside was empty. We got to the hospital and I knew I had to get a D&C since it wasn’t safe. They gave me the option to wait, but they did an unltrasound again and found the sac with no baby in it. I started being in horrible pain and they made me wait 2 hours before being put into a room. That hospital was horrible to being with, but I hated every second of the experience. I had to walk outside to where my boyfriend was waiting and tell him that the only option was to get the D&C done…I just remember him holding me outside of the hospital while I cried and cried. I finally went into labor and delivery and got my own room until I was ready for the procedure. I started having intense labor pains, that turned into a ton of bleeding and sitting on the toilet wanting to just die because I felt beyond shitty. I suffered for an hour until they came to get me. I threw up in front of the nurse because I couldn’t hold it in from all the pain, which I felt bad about because I didn’t want them to have to pick up my vomit, but after that, I was put on the bed and moved to prep. I waited another hour in a half, and that was the worst part because I was in non stop pain and couldn’t get any medication. I remember just being so upset asking the nurse for anything over and over, and they told me it’s like I’m in labor and there’s nothing they can do until my OB comes. My Blood pressure was so high and I just held on so tight to the side of bed wanting it to end. Crazy part is, before my OB came in, I felt the need to push, so I did, and after that, the pain kind of settled. I was so cold at that point and wanted to just leave. They did the procedure and I went back to my room to recover for another hour. I remember crying again, but my boyfriend held my hand and said it would be okay so I appreciated that and again,  went with it.

We both dealt with the miscarriage differently, but we got through it. I learned that, it’s okay to cry and feel the pain of it. It was not my fault and when the time is right, I’ll be able to have my baby. As time went on, I got stronger and became thankful to know that I can have a baby despite the issues I have with my body. I still and will always wonder about my little one, but I know everything happens for a reason and I look forward to the future and whats in store for me and my future family.

Let’s talk weight & judgement

First things first.. A person’s weight, is their own business. I’ve always been thin, but I’m also somewhat fit. That’s just my body type and I work at keeping my curves. I’ve been judged, but I’ve learned that, the people who judge, are the ones who are truly struggling.  However, when I read rude comments about how a person should either gain more weight or lose weight, it hits a nerve for me. I can’t stand people who think they can say whatever they want just because they are behind a screen. Pretty sure they wouldn’t have the guts to say it in person. I do my part by reporting comments like that because I’ve seen what those comments can do to people. Now, if you see that this person may need to change their ways, then yes, gently try to talk to them, but research ways to approach that if you’re more straight to the point, because you could do more harm than good and then let it go. They need to want to make the change themselves. Behind a screen or  not, nobody should make jokes or put their two cents in. Where did manners and common decency go? You don’t know the battle people are struggling to keep the weight on or off. Not easy on both ends. A bit of advice I would give is, tell people they’re beautiful or handsome and lift them up. Don’t tell them to eat more or eat less and if you must, encourage a healthy way to live.

People I used to know

I used to have this friend that I basically grew up with and she became completely different as we got older and put me on the back burner while she grew closer to other people. Wasn’t there for me anymore and once my sister had her first kid, they became close. Talk about weird timing. Funny how kids can attract people who weren’t really there. I guess closed minds, attract other closed minds. Having an open mind means, you’re able to process other people’s feelings and thoughts and accept it for what it is, but these people I knew, are opposite of that. I used to think I couldn’t live without these people and how could life go on if they aren’t in it, but let me tell you, it’s doable. You start to see them for the type of people they are and as long as I’m not having to deal with that amount of fake, I’m good. You try to include them in certain events in your life and for me, I wish I didn’t because they weren’t there. Of course, I learned from that and told myself, I deserve only the best in my life and knowing someone for many, many years doesn’t mean anything. Come to think of it, I’ve had a couple of friends that neglected me because I was living my own life and not theirs. I either had to live by their rules or I’m out. I guess I should say thanks for showing me what I don’t need or want to be surrounded by. It is okay to lose people (friends or blood related family).. That seems like it’s hard to deal with, but in all honesty, it gets better. Once good people come into your life, you’ll start to see that, what you once knew, was only a little bump in the road and life happily goes on. Best advice I can give is, do you! If you lose people by doing that, as Charlie Sheen would say, ”winning!” 😉

-A

Since it’s Valentine’s Day and all

I’m not a big Valentine’s Day person, because I think, love should be celebrated everyday and gifts of any kind, should happen more than once a year. I wanted to write about what love means to me.. Love, is respecting the person you’re with. It’s giving hugs when it’s not expected. I love doing the dishes and all of a sudden, I get a hug from behind and a kiss on the neck. Saying I love you whenever the other person leaves and saying be safe just to show you worry about them. Always saying I love you before going to sleep because you never know if you’ll wake up. Being goofy and laughing at stupid things that only make sense to the both of you. Holding each other just for the hell of it. Taking the time to do what makes the other person happy, even if it’s not something you would choose to do. Compromising, because you’re a team and it’s not all about you. Being completely selfless. Being able to put someone else’s needs in front of your own, is a beautiful thing. Always remember, your needs are important too. Being able to talk about anything as well as just being silent and content. Holding hands while watching a movie or being out in public. Opening doors for each other..Works both ways. Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I can’t make my man feel special. Love, is sharing food and asking if the other person wants something. I don’t think over the top love, should ever die in a relationship. Meaning, no matter what life throws at you or how hectic your day is, if you truly love the person you’re with, keep that flame burning all day everyday and make them feel like they are number one. Love, is not neglecting your partner. Love, is making time for sexytime. Love, is not making excuses as to why you can’t go do something together. Making time to make memories with each other, is very important in my book. I hope by reading this, it inspired you to go out and love harder. Have an amazing and lovely day!

“And I’ve realized that the Beatles got it wrong. Love isn’t all we need—love is all there is.” -MM

Ginger sharing time

I’m real

I’m blunt

I’m happy

I’m trustworthy

I’m loyal

I’m sweet

I’m caring

I’m loving

I’m fun

I’m passionate

I’m creative

I’m honest

I’m nice

I’m exciting, wild and free. I’m wise. I love to have a good time. I love to dance. I love long car rides. I love looking at the stars and watching airplanes fly over me. I love writing. I love laughing so hard that I cry. I love the simple things. I love helping other people. I love supporting the ones I love and the new people I let into my circle. I love watching people succeed. I love animals more than people. I love to give. I love the smell of my dogs sweat. I  love getting tattooed. I love to make people smile. I love that I have manners. I love being surrounded by genuinely good people. I love to give my all. I love to sing. I love to clean. I love doggy kisses. I love kissing in general. I love big hugs. I love taking pictures and documenting everything. I love thinking about having my own family one day. I love picturing my wedding day. I love to grow. I love to read thrillers. I love scary movies. I love concerts and loud music. I love going to plays and my favorite part is when everyone claps for the actors. I love massages.. If I was rich, I would hire a masseuse to come everyday. I love Starbucks. I love soaking in a bath with candles lit. I love hiking. I love my dad’s stories. I love anything sweet. I love to run. I love candles. I love being able to figure people out. I love the smell of the Pirate’s ride at Disneyland. I love trying new things. I love not caring what anyone thinks. I love doing what makes me happy. I love being myself. I love watching my mom draw. I love when babies laugh. I love knowing I’m going to be a mom one day. I love Pinterest. I love that my dad has a Pinterest. I love my family no matter what. I love horseback riding. I love fast food. I love cheesecake (secretly a Golden Girl). I love to organize. I love that I stick up for myself. I love that I don’t give up. I love the river. I love to watch live comedy shows. I love funny people. I love that I’m sarcastic and witty. I love the rain and drinking hot chocolate with whip cream. I love that I don’t let people walk all over me. I love that I learned from my mistakes. I love knowing that everything will be okay in the end.

To be continued…

-A

Commitment & why you should honor your word

I have a few pet peeves, but not keeping your word is number one. Commitment is very important to me because it shows that you respect the person enough to follow through. No matter how tired I am, what obstacle I have in my way, I always try to honor my word. If I truly can not keep my word, then I explain myself and apologize. It’s manners that matter. The people who can just continue to disappoint over and over again with their non commitments they don’t keep, puzzle me. On top of that, if they don’t apologize for their actions, that’s even worse. The more you don’t honor your word, the less trusting you become. To have trust is the key to any relationship. A healthy reminder is, if you say you’ll do something, stick to it and positive vibes will come your way.

-A

Beware of phony Day Cares

I’ve worked with kids for close to 8 years and I have similar experiences at the few Day Cares I was in contact with. Not good experiences, I should add. Why write about this? Because parents deserve to be aware of what goes on before sending their little ones to incompetent people. Just because someone has many degrees or whatever it is they have to prove they can ”teach” does not make them a good teacher. In my opinion, half of the people working with kids, shouldn’t be. Out of all of the Day Cares I was in, I was one of 2 or 3 people, to actually speak up when I knew something wasn’t right. At all the Day Cares, I was told to not tell parents how their kids day really went. I was told to say that they had a good day, even if all they did was cry or get hurt by another kid. I went against what I was told and said how their kids day went because I wasn’t about to lie. I always would treat the kids how I would want my kids to be treated. We ended up losing parents and believe me, that always made me happy because their kids deserved better. I witnessed Directors lie to parents, as well as, the owners lying to parents. Lots of false advertising going on. Sad to say, out of all the day cares, there were only maybe 5 good teachers who gave love and did what was required of them. Lots of yelling at the kids for just being kids. I remember not being able to stand how fake teachers could be, when the parents came to pick up their kids, like, you didn’t care about their well-being all day and now you do… Some teachers would just be on their phones, eating snacks, joking around, worrying about themselves and their plans, all while the kids were being neglected. Just because you follow a so-called schedule and do work with them, sometimes, doesn’t make you a good teacher. A good teacher is someone who loves, cares, always puts the kids first, doesn’t yell or handle any situation in that manner and never lies. I couldn’t understand how these so-called teachers had their own kids or even had kids on the way. I was told by one teacher to not let the kids use the color brown…. I just looked at her like, are you for real right now…. What’s worse, is the director was all for that.. Kids should be able to use any color they want to color with. You don’t limit creativity. I would pick the kids up, give them hugs, hold them and I remember being told not to do that so many times. I wouldn’t listen because all the kids loved me so I knew I was doing something right. I could walk into any room and the kids would run to me. That was rare for them to do that. people got so jealous and upset by that, but it only encouraged me more, to keep doing what I did best. Being told to tell parents that we do certain activities when that wasn’t true at all, just because they wanted to attract more parents to bring their kids, was unbelievably wrong and I didn’t sit back and let that happen. I said exactly what we did so they could make an honest decision. I believe it is okay to have a good time while working, however, you should know when you’re going too far or realize it’s time to focus. Not many people know how to do that. There are some situations I legally can’t mention, but I will say, that I’m disgusted by how the situations were handled. If you’re going to be a director, be the best director you can be and make the kids your number one priority. That’s common sense. favoritism, was a main problem at all the facilities. You don’t be buddy, buddy with certain coworkers when you’re the boss. You certainly don’t buy pizza for just you and 2 other coworkers… Rude. I could go on for days about this, but I wanted to give a glimpse into this real problem, that everyone needs to be more aware of. Best advice I can give as an insider is, I highly suggest you stay clear of Day Cares, but if you can’t, find one that has cameras that you are able to access throughout the day. Do not fall for the facility that says, they monitor it themselves. Make sure you are able to know what’s happening with your child at any time of the day. I love working with kids, but I would never work in another Day Care again.

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